Mama Hearts💕

 

So.....I'm finally catching on.....

One day you go to a hospital and they hand you a soft squishy tiny person with sweet smelling duck fuzz hair. They actually let you leave the hospital with this angel straight from heaven and you get to keep it for always as your very own.

They ask you for no credentials, nor do they require you to have any experience....they just send you out the door with this helpless little person and no instructions.

This tiny helpless creature can't do anything.

It can't talk or help you understand their needs. They just holler until you figure out what to do. It needs you 24/7. Without you it will die. So.....you learn.

You pour every moment of every day helping it along so it will be safe and strong and loved.

You learn to follow this tiny being around so it cannot get hurt. When they begin to walk and run in joyful freedom you learn to run and keep in step. It's up to you to be sure they don't get hurt.

And they try.....every day they try out some new adventure that might endanger their little lives because they come to you not knowing anything.....nothing!

Things like.....stoves are hot, streets have dangerous cars, don't drink poison, dogs can bite.....basics...they don't know even the basics! ( Lord, you think to yourself..... I had no idea what I was signing up for! Please help me!)

Over time you stay closer and more observant because the little person who moved into your home and life gets more daring and adventurous.

They want to do crazy things like ride skate boards, jump off diving boards, ski down icy hills and learn to drive cars......and on and on.

It gets wilder and more exciting each day.

And the world itself gets more dangerous and you just know your little person is going to have to face things that you were too busy to even think about when you first brought them home.

Then....they tell you one day, after you've spent a million hours watching them so carefully, that it's okay now, you can stop worrying because we're ready to leave you and go off without you. We don't need you to take care of us anymore.

Seriously...are you kidding?!

You mean just like this you are good to go?

And I'm just supposed to go back to the normal carefree life I had before you were given to me at the hospital....that day a few months ago when you smelled like baby powder heaven and you were all soft and squishy?

The hospital never told me about this!

I'm your mama. You can't just take your little self out there alone....no way!

And they look at you with that face. You know what I mean.....that "My mom is a crazy person face."

And they leave.

You were sure at one time that the crazy busy messy days of childhood would truly last an eternity.....and here we are.....standing at the door as they drive off and wave goodbye.

They never tell you this at the hospital.

I guess they assume you know these things.

And I guess we do, but mama hearts are never prepared. They need a lot of help to understand.

I used to be young.

I thought it was just a couple years ago...

I brought a sweet tiny babe home in my arms. I didn't have a clue. Young and hopelessly uneducated in how to do motherhood. But I had my sweet Auntie Marion....that's her above with me and my chubby curly headed boy......my first child.

Poor thing.....I'm not sure how he lived through my inexperience but he did and he's normal and all grown up with a big happy family......I wish I could hold that little guy again....and all of my little ones.

I've been a mama heart almost 50 years, but honestly, I don't know how those years flew by.

I had my last precious bundle way on up in years ....in my 40s.

She looks like an angel....but she took some working on. She tried me hard and I often met her toe to toe. She's a precious godly young woman today.

It took a lot of work......but we made it through the years of homeschool and unending home jobs, I thought many a times I couldn't carry on to the end. But I did.

Almost 50 years of learning, teaching, praying, getting up day in and day out to give and give and give....

And now.... suddenly....my mama heart is no longer raising up little roots.

They're all grown.

Off they journey.

There's been good and bad days......but Jesus helped us all and He still is.

My baby raising and child training years are done.

Now I'm just mom.

The one you can call for prayer.

The one looking back over my years as they look forward to all that lies ahead in their busy years.

They didn't tell me at the hospital what to do when the sweet smelling bundle left home without looking back.

Jesus is helping me figure that out.

You stand back.....and pray.

You quietly look on as they create life apart from you.

You watch as they learn and grow.

And you let go.

You hold Jesus Hand and let go some more.

Because, as my sweet husband said today, we've done what we can, now it's up to them.

Now it's up to them to use what we were able to give them, which sometimes didn't seem like much since we had so much to learn ourselves, and we leave the rest to Jesus.

And we pray until our last breath....